Be right back...

Dear Mr. Man that Shoots Arrows,

I'm so sorry to have been away for so long.  I have been packing up my apartment so that I can move into my new house, but the seller is being difficult and trying to back out of the deal.  I will be back after I manage to whip her ass.  I am attaching the awesome story you sent me.  Maybe God is a vegan after all.

Sincerely yours,

Sadie

Link:
Big Butter Jesus sizzles.